Election 2022: Minnesota Secretary of State

I’m back from South Korea, super jet-lagged and foggy, but this is a very straightforward one so I should be okay, right?

On the ballot:

Kim Crockett (GOP)
Steve Simon (DFL)

Kim Crockett is frankly despicable. She’s a proponent of Trump’s big lie and has been completely open about her desire to make it harder for people to exercise their right to vote. On her website she says we should “protect vulnerable citizens” and says “the elderly, homeless, and non-English speaking citizens are being exploited for their votes. Why do election rules allow and encourage this?” — she’s previously questioned the right of disabled people and non-English-speakers to vote and I read this as more of the same.

On her Twitter feed, she retweeted an adulatory post about Giorgia Meloni, who is, at minimum, fascist-adjacent, and a tweet saying “Never Forget what they did to us” with a clip from Halloween 2020 suggesting safe ways for children to have fun during the pre-vaccine pandemic Halloween.

She’s whined about “ad hominem attacks” which is hilarious because she’s genuinely an incredibly terrible person. Why would I trust a really bad person, a liar and conspiracy theorist, a racist and ableist, someone who won’t even commit to accepting the results of the election she’s running in, to run elections? As I noted back in August, the Republican party has made it abundantly clear that they have complete contempt for the entire concept of government of, for, and by the people. No one should trust any Republican with elections, in Minnesota or any other state, but especially not Kim Crockett.

ETA: Also her husband is a huuuuuuuuuge fan of voter intimidation. He’s not the one running, but when you’re running for a job overseeing elections and you’re married to someone who goes to a Tea Party Patriots meeting to talk about how Republicans should round up family members who are “deputies or sheriffs” to be “part of a SWAT team” on election day, you get no benefit of the doubt from me. Kim Crockett should be allowed nowhere near this job!

Steve Simon has done an excellent job — in particular, he did a really good job in 2020 dealing with the complexities of elections in a pandemic. I would absolutely and without hesitation vote for Steve Simon even if his opponent were one of the handful of Republicans standing up against Trump; under the circumstance I would crawl over broken glass to vote for Steve, but fortunately, thanks to Steve, I’ll have lots of better options, including no-excuses in-person absentee voting. Vote for Steve, who will never make you crawl over broken glass to cast your ballot (okay, maybe I should have waited until I was less jet-lagged to write this post…?)


In addition to writing political commentary, I write science fiction and fantasy. My book that came out in April 2021, Chaos on CatNet, takes place in a future Minneapolis. It’s a sequel to Catfishing on CatNet and signed copies of both books are usually available from Dreamhaven and the NOW REOPENED Uncle Hugo’s (it’s at 2716 E 31st St in Minneapolis, in the former Glass Endeavors.)

I do not have a Patreon or Ko-Fi, but you can make a donation to encourage my work! I get a lot of satisfaction watching fundraisers I highlight getting funded (or, in the case of the Movement Voter fundraiser, continuing to raise money past their goal). I explained back in May why I’m fundraising for the Movement Voter PAC and that fundraiser is still active.

I also went looking and found a cool DonorsChoose fundraiser for a classroom in Minneapolis: a science teacher at Sullivan STEAM magnet needs some better computers so his students can actually program the cool robots they got.

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Primary Elections 2022: Minnesota Secretary of State

This is another easy one.

On the DFL side of the ballot, your options are:

Steve Simon
Steve Carlson

Steve Simon
Steve Simon is the incumbent and I think he’s done a fantastic job. A+, absolutely voting for him, no question.

Steve Carlson
Steve Carlson’s website includes the year “2018” in it and also “forUSSenate,” so apparently he still hasn’t taken the free advice I offered him back in 2014, when he was running with a website that had the year “2010” in it, which is that if running for offices is your hobby, you should register a website that names neither a specific office nor gives a specific year.

Anyway. He ran for Senate as an Independence candidate in 2014. He ran for the 4th district US House seat in 2016 and the main thing I took from his website is that he’s not a good rapper. (He’s an old, white, conservative dude, so this should not be surprising.) In 2018 he ran in the DFL Primary for Senate against Amy Klobuchar and in 2020 he ran in the DFL Primary for Senate against Tina Smith.

In order to run in a partisan primary, he had to sign an affidavit of candidacy affirming that he’d either gone to his DFL Precinct Caucus in 2022 or that he intended to vote mainly for Democrats in November. He says he went to the caucus (I asked) and I am more willing to believe that Steve actually went to a DFL caucus than AJ Kern, because over on his Facebook he has a post that at least mentions caucuses, and his latest hobbyhorse (which he has ranted about over and over and over at length and in detail on Twitter) is that the DFL has a rule requiring gender balance for delegates elected to the State Convention, which makes me think he tried to become a delegate to the State Convention. (Or some slightly more selective convention, it might not have been the state one.)

Steve’s biggest obstacle in being a DFL delegate is not his race or sex but the fact that he’s an anti-gay, anti-Muslim Trump supporter with complete contempt for the bodily autonomy or human rights of women. Democrats mostly do not choose as delegates people who are this far out of step with DFL principles. Do not vote for him.

On the Republican side of the ballot you’ll find:

Erik van Mechelen
Kim Crockett (GOP endorsed)

If you take a look at Erik’s website, you will find a website devoted to Trump’s Big Lie, that Joe Biden did not win the 2020 election. (Also, he wants to ban all machine counts and require a hand count of every election. I will note that we did a painstaking hand count a few years back and it took a really long time, cost a lot of money, and the Democrat won.) If you look at Kim’s website, you’ll find a bunch of doublespeak about “safeguarding” and “protecting” and “empowering.” Just to be clear, Kim is just as much of an election denier as Erik — she just knows how to say the quiet part quietly.

ETA: She managed to get fired from her job at the Center for the American Experiment (an ultraconservative area think tank) back in 2019 by being openly racist in an interview with the New York Times. “I think of America, the great assimilator, as a rubber band, but with this — we’re at the breaking point. These aren’t people coming from Norway, let’s put it that way. These people are very visible.” She issued an apology at the time, but doubled down in April of this year.

The Republican party has made it really, really, really clear that they have complete contempt for the entire concept of government of, for, and by the people. No one should trust them with elections, in Minnesota or any other state.


In addition to writing political commentary, I write science fiction and fantasy. My book that came out in April 2021, Chaos on CatNet, takes place in a future Minneapolis. It’s a sequel to Catfishing on CatNet and signed copies of both books are usually available from Dreamhaven. You will also be able to get them from Uncle Hugo’s when it reopens at 2716 E 31st St! (and maybe by mail order now? I’m not sure how much mail order Don is doing while getting ready to re-open.)

I do not have a Patreon or Ko-Fi, but you can make a donation to encourage my work! I get a lot of satisfaction watching fundraisers I highlight getting funded (or, in the case of the Movement Voter fundraiser, continuing to raise money past their goal). I explained back in May why I’m fundraising for the Movement Voter PAC and that fundraiser is still active. (Also, I owe some embarrassing readings of my juvenalia to the Internet.)

I also went looking and found two DonorsChoose fundraisers for classrooms at Bethune Community School in North Minneapolis: math manipulatives for pre-K students (this is such a good idea) and a nice book organizer for a first-grade classroom where the shelving is coming apart.

Election 2018: Minnesota Secretary of State

JESUS H. CHRIST, PEOPLE, WHY WOULD ANY OF YOU TRUST A REPUBLICAN FOR EVEN FIVE GODDAMN MINUTES WITH A BALLOT?

(This whole thing was written in all-caps but it started to get kind of long and difficult to read. But please imagine me shouting this whole post.)

The entire Republican party, nationwide, has made it absolutely goddamn motherfucking clear that they will deny the vote to any person they judge likely to be a Democrat if they can come up with even the barest pretext that allows them to do it. They will purge voter registrations based on race and zip code. They will require people to get a government-issued photo ID, and then close down every office that would supply those IDs if they’re reachable by people in poor city neighborhoods or mostly-black small towns. They will, in a state where the local reservations have never gotten around to assigning street addresses, announce with less than a month before the election that you’ll need a street address to vote. They will reject online voter registrations. And while insisting that this is all to ensure the integrity of our elections (WHICH IS A LIE) they will refuse to fix systems that can literally be hacked.

Republicans are the minority in this country. Even with our fucked-up system that lets Presidents win when they lost the popular vote, that lets Senators who represent 44% of the US population approve a Supreme Court Justice for life, even with the structural unfairness that gives Republicans a disproportionate voice in running this country, they know, they know that they cannot win if they do not cheat.

Steve Simon is a perfectly fine Secretary of State and to my knowledge, he’s an upstanding citizen of excellent character. Right now, though? Right now, I would vote for him if he were a literal yellow dog.

We have a Republican guy named John Howe running who wants you to believe that the real problem here is “voter fraud” (IT IS NOT) and a guy named William Denney who’s apparently the last Jessecrat standing who wants you to believe that it would be better to have someone from a third party running elections (it’s possible he has a point but it doesn’t matter; he’s not going to win).

Vote for Steve Simon.